YOU SAID:
NOBODY LIKE THIS I HAVENT TAKEN A SHOWER IN 9 WEEKS
INTO JAPANESE
このような誰も私は9週間でシャワーを浴びました
BACK INTO ENGLISH
Anyone like this I took a shower in 9 weeks
INTO JAPANESE
このような人は9週間でシャワーを浴びました
BACK INTO ENGLISH
Such a person took a shower in 9 weeks
INTO JAPANESE
そんな人は9週間でシャワーを浴びました
it is unlikely that this phrase will ever reach equilibrium