YOU SAID:
my friend is a total douche bag
INTO JAPANESE
私の友人は総潅水バッグです。
BACK INTO ENGLISH
A friend of mine is a total douche bag.
INTO JAPANESE
私の友人は、合計潅水バッグです。
BACK INTO ENGLISH
A friend of mine is a total douche bag.
That didn't even make that much sense in English.