YOU SAID:
if i eated soap, no i didn't because i did.
INTO JAPANESE
私は石鹸を食べた場合、私はしなかった私はしたので、私はしませんでした。
BACK INTO ENGLISH
If I ate soap, I didn't, so I didn't.
INTO JAPANESE
もし私が石鹸を食えたら、私はそうしなかったので、私は食しなかった。
BACK INTO ENGLISH
If I ate soap, I didn't, so I didn't.
That didn't even make that much sense in English.