Translated Labs

You said:

I mean, if I went around saying I was an emperor just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me they'd put me away!

into Japanese

つまり、湿ったビントが私にシミターを投げつけたからといって、私が皇帝であると言って回ったら、彼らは私を追い出すでしょう!